Author of romance books, including "Apparitions," "Serendipity," and the "Distant Shores" series
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Yesterday, St. Valentine’s Day, was billed as the most love-filled, romantic day of the year, so it’s perhaps unsurprising that today’s blog post is about romance.
In the article Porn or Erotic Writing, I mention that I’m both “a romantic and a dreamer.” I discussed the latter in last week’s Fantasy blog post, so it makes perfect sense, to me at least, to follow that with this one, regardless of the time of year.
Just as we did in both of those pieces, let’s start by looking at the dictionary definition of romantic according to Merriam Webster…
of, relating to, or involving love between two people : making someone think of love : suitable for romance : thinking about love and doing and saying things to show that you love someone
In addition to what I’ve already said about the timing of this post, romantic is mentioned in the related words section of the definition of dreamer that we discussed last week. To use a favorite analogy of mine, the two go hand in hand, like lovers, if you will, and I’ll say more about that in a little while.
Let’s now look at some of the definitions of both the title subject and something that goes hand in hand with it…
to feel great affection for (someone) : to feel love for (someone) : to feel sexual or romantic love for (someone) : to like or desire (something) very much : to take great pleasure in (something)
a medieval tale based on legend, chivalric love and adventure, or the supernatural : a prose narrative treating imaginary characters involved in events remote in time or place and usually heroic, adventurous, or mysterious : a love story especially in the form of a novel : a class of such literature something (as an extravagant story or account) that lacks basis in fact : an emotional attraction or aura belonging to an especially heroic era, adventure, or activity : love affair
Of course, there are literally countless definitions of love, so I admit that I’ve been very selective here, in referencing those that are relevant to both me and my writing.
Love is, itself, the most precious gift that anyone can give another. The gift of love, is, I believe, absolutely priceless.
For me, personally, the expression of love is much, much more than three little words. While it is, undoubtedly, beyond delightful to hear my husband say “I love you,” and for me to tell him the same, it is not the be all and end all. Far from it. I’m being totally honest when I say that we rarely say those words to each other. In truth, we don’t need to say them. Why? Because we both prefer to show each other how we feel.
One of the first things you’re taught as a writer is “show, don’t tell.” And it’s something that goes far beyond writing for me. It’s a principle, perhaps even a mantra, that I both write and live by.
There are infinite ways in which me and my husband show each other how much we love one another. Some are more obvious than others, including making love; the absolute connection of body, mind, heart and soul… a kiss, no matter how passionate… an embrace… holding hands (yes, I said I’d mention it again)… a tender touch… an adoring glance.
Others are perhaps less obvious, but just as important and today’s technological world plays its part… checking our preferred messaging app, but not saying anything, therefore indicating, thanks to the “last seen” notification, that you’re being thought of. It might be hard to believe, but I’m being totally honest, as always, when I say that more often than not we both check the app either at the exact same time, or a split second later. At other times it might be a quick message, if only to say “hi” or ask how the other is doing.
Aside from technology, it can be doing something that the other needed to do, or doing something unexpected. The possibilities truly are endless.
Like many topics I’ve discussed in these articles, my personal thinking is also reflected in my stories. In Serendipity, while their love and affection for each other, as well as their attraction, is evident pretty much from the beginning, only once does Sam actually tell Kate he loves her. And even then the phrase isn’t limited to just three words. Instead, referring to an aspect of her personality, he tells her “I love you for it.” Similarly, much later in the story, Kate says the same to Sam. Both of them prefer to show each other how they feel, instead of telling.
Most importantly it is not restricted, as I alluded to in my opening paragraph, to just one day a year. For me, for us and indeed in essence for the characters I create in the stories I write, it is a way of life.
That said, it’s not all hearts and flowers and doesn’t need to involve bought gifts. As I said earlier, for me, the gift of love is absolutely priceless. Spending any amount of time with my husband, is, for me, romantic in itself. That might sound like cliched nonsense, but in a world as crazy and stressed as the one we live in, it’s true. And I can assure you that he feels the same.
I, personally, feel that everything I mentioned in the section above, not only shows our love for each other, but they are also romantic. Yes, we do love the more traditional aspects of romance, such as candlelit dinners. But for us it isn’t just the meal itself that is romantic or indeed sensual. Actually preparing and cooking it together is too. In truth, it doesn’t matter what we’re making, it could be prime steak, or breakfast for dinner, the key ingredient is that we’re making it together. And that, for us, is what romance is about.
Do you agree with what I’ve said here? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please let me know by leaving a comment.
In this post, I’ll say more about my thoughts on fantasy. It is something I touched on briefly in the Porn or Erotic Writing article that can be found here.
Earlier in that piece, before fantasy was mentioned, I said that I myself am a dreamer, so let’s start there, with the definition, according to Merriam Webster…
one that dreams : one who lives in a world of fancy and imagination
Picking up on the first definition, here’s the definition of dream, according to the same source…
a series of thoughts, visions, or feelings that happen during sleep : an idea or vision that is created in your imagination and that is not real : something that you have wanted very much to do, be, or have for a long time
Of course, dreams don’t only happen at night. At least mine certainly don’t. There are many, many times when I drift off into a dreamy state during the day, into a daydream…
a pleasant visionary usually wishful creation of the imagination
I’ve always been a dreamer. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t dream in one way or another. For me, it’s not only an integral part of who I am personally, but it’s also essential to who I am as an author. Especially when coupled with something else that’s mentioned in all three of the above definitions…
the ability to imagine things that are not real : the ability to form a picture in your mind of something that you have not seen or experienced : the ability to think of new things : something that only exists or happens in your mind
In the Related Words sections of both daydream and imagination, you’ll find…
something that is produced by the imagination : an idea about doing something that is far removed from normal reality : the act of imagining something : a book, movie, etc., that tells a story about things that happen in an imaginary world
Yes, I know it’s taken us a little while to get here, but I did say that I was expanding on what I’d said in the other article. In truth I already have, in a way. I’ve taken you on what I hope is an enlightening, insightful journey along a couple of pathways, by way of definitions, that interlink.
Personally, mine and my husband’s life is pretty good, but it wasn’t always that way for me. When times were tough, I’d escape into a world that my mind, my imagination, had created. My dreams, my fantasies, took many forms. Sometimes the vision was location based, where I lived or was visiting somewhere different. There are times, even now, when I still have that dream.
In other dreams the scene/s that played out were of a sensual and yes, erotic nature. One of the beauties of dreams or fantasy, as well as being able to explore worlds that are far removed from reality, is that they allow you to do so safely. Without fear of being hurt, either physically or emotionally.
It is my opinion that fantasies are critical to our development as we get older. Yes, I’m referring to those of a sexual nature now. The fantasy exploration can help us develop our intimate identity. In the Porn or Erotic Writing article, I mention some of my personal preferences. Preferences that I either include, or indeed omit, from my writing.
How have I come to those decisions? How do I know, with abject certainty that I prefer to make love, instead of having sex? How do I know that I dislike anything involving sensual contact that isn’t consensual? Because I’ve explored those scenarios, safely, in my mind, in my imagination.
Our fantasies are very personal. Just as each and every one of us is unique, so too are our fantasies. They are unique to us. They are also often secretive. Something that we dare not mention to anyone, including our partner, or the object of our desire.
While there is nothing at all wrong with that, sharing your sensual, intimate fantasies can also greatly enrich a relationship. Doing so certainly brought my husband and I closer and indeed has added even more depth, no pun intended, to our intimacy.
Fantasies, in some form or another, are a key part of my stories. It is my hope that all of them, including Serendipity and others yet to be released, allow you, the reader, to escape to a world that is, perhaps, far removed from your reality.
In Serendipity, Sam Meyers meets Kate, his high school crush, the object of his teenage fantasies, some thirty years later. Back then, in his senior year, he had been too shy to even ask her to dance, never mind take things to the next level. Unbeknown to him, sophomore Kate felt similarly, yet kept her feelings secret.
During the school’s Homecoming Weekend, they chat and admit their attraction. Then, as their relationship develops, in scenes that are sensual, pleasing and erotic, they explore their long held intimate desires and fantasies.
You can read Chapter One of Serendipity here. Or if you prefer to download a sample, you can do so here.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, please leave me a comment and let me know.
The long-awaited launch day is finally here and Serendipity is available now!
Serendipity by author Rebekah S. Fiore, is a heartwarming, steamy romantic tale about a couple who finally reveal their secretive adoration for and attraction to each other.
Sam Meyers, a successful businessman in his late forties, spots his high school crush, Kate, as the crowds gather at the beginning of the school’s Homecoming Weekend. Will he be able to overcome his shyness after so many years and get his girl? To his relief the answer is yes!
You can purchase Serendipity for Kindle in all Amazon markets by clicking here.
Please leave a comment, I’d love to chat
Rebekah S. Fiore 